It's About Time

Time. We never seem to have enough of it. Some seasons it crawls by, stalling out and creeping slowly along in excruciating detail. Other seasons it flies by, scarcely allowing us a moment to take a breath, carrying with it experiences in an endless rush. I (Camilla) am particularly reflective of time right now as I am about to send my youngest child to college and have recently lost my mother to Alzheimer’s disease. When we moved mom to a memory care facility, she said in a rare and heartbreaking moment of complete clarity, “I just thought I would have more time.” 

For everything there is an appointed time, and an appropriate time for every activity on earth. Ecclesiastes 3:1

My mom kept a stack of notecards with memorable sermon notes, Bible verses, thoughts and notes from articles she read. They are a treasure trove of wisdom. One of the cards, dated a few years before my oldest child was born, records her reflections on how to spend her remaining time on earth. She penned a prayer, which she may have gleaned from a favorite Guideposts entry, asking the Lord to show her how to spend her time, and reminding herself of the litmus test for spending time well: does this activity have “heart”? This question is a way of asking, is this the best use of my time? Will this activity have an eternal impact? Will this allow me to love God and love others to the best of my ability, making the most of every opportunity God provides? 

This is an excellent filter to use in any season, and it makes me wonder, what are some others? When I was practicing law, I kept track of my time at work in six-minute increments. This process was excruciating, but also beneficial in its relentless focus on efficiency. Below are some of the lessons I have learned over the years related to time management, what would you add? 

Understand all responsibilities.

This is the first step because in order to manage your time, you have to first know what you are responsible for. Your list may include items such as family, work, school, volunteer activities, exercise, rest, social obligations, hobbies and others. Make a list of everything and be as expansive as possible, remembering that you are also responsible for keeping yourself healthy mentally, emotionally and physically!

Categorize and Prioritize. 

The next step is to categorize and prioritize all of your responsibilities. You may want to organize into categories such as family/home, work/school, health/wellness, social, etc. After you categorize all items, prioritize them. What is most important? What is best? What is necessary? What has heart? What do I need to add? What do I need to remove? Do I need help in any areas? If you cannot afford to hire help, can you share responsibilities with a friend? For example, can you trade babysitting with another mom? Be creative with your community and help one another. 

Know Yourself.

This is a big one. We need to be self aware. We need to be able to recognize our natural tendencies and name them. If you don’t know this about yourself, ask a spouse or friend, they’ll know! Part of knowing yourself is recognizing what may be tripping you up. For example, a perfectionist may need to take note of the principle of diminishing returns. After a certain amount of time is spent on a task, additional time spent does not significantly alter the quality of the final work product. Recognizing the point at which this happens is a necessary skill in time management. Another problem is that we can tend to spend too much time on assignments that are easier for us and too little time on assignments that are more difficult or that we do not enjoy. However, we all can agree that sometimes it’s both necessary and acceptable to set a time limit on a project and finish within that time frame. 
If you have a tendency to be on a device, it may also be helpful to evaluate your time on social media (or any other activity that steals time from you). Don’t think about it as “wasted time” (although it might be). Instead, think about it as stolen time. You might be allowing random ads, online shopping, and other things to steal your time from you. Get ruthless and take back your schedule. Know your tendencies and put guardrails in place to protect your time. 

You may also need to shift work during seasons. For example, during the summer you may have to let housework go to spend more time with your kids while they are free from school schedules. If you are at the neighborhood pool every day so that your kids learn to swim, you may not get the clothes folded. Is that okay? Sure! Maybe you need a “fold free” summer! Or maybe you need a “paper plate lunch” summer. Maybe your kids are old enough to help more. These are just a few examples, but it is okay (and often necessary!) to change your priorities in a season. 

Finally, it can be helpful to know how much time you spend on tasks that are mundane, or that you simply do not enjoy. We all have these responsibilities–it is a part of life! Knowing how much time they require can help you to create a positive mindset. Can you meal prep and clean up after preschoolers to the glory of God? Unseen or monotonous work is elevated when we do. God cares about how we carry out even the most mundane work; both the work and the worker are important to him. 

Reevaluate regularly.

To stay on track, review your schedule and time allocations regularly and make any necessary adjustments. Ask for help if you need it. It’s easy to become overwhelmed, but unnecessary to stay that way. Reach out to a friend, neighbor, or mentor for advice. Share ideas with other moms in your Relay Exchange group. We were not made to do this alone! 

What would you add to this list?